Week 3 #52weekchallenge

Wondering what happened to week 2? Yeah, that week was just fail. Too much was happening that week for me to get this stuff done. Anyhow, week 3 though was awesome! I got all the stuff done in good time and I'm quite satisfied with how it all turned out. Here's what I did last week:

1. DIY Project

Canvas art - Dancer

Not that I'm a good artist, but I had an empty canvas lying around for a while & thought I'd put it to some use. Of course I cheated ;) This is not a free hand painting. I got an image off the web, stenciled it onto the canvas and filled it in with paint and glitter. This particular image is of a kathak dancer and the gold glitter on her feet are her Ghungroos.

2. Cooking Project

Shutki Maach

This is my favorite dish! It's otherwise known as dry fish and it's a speciality in Tripura (North-East India) where my maternal grandma's from. Not many people like it so it isn't easily available nor are there recipes or videos online to learn it on my own. For this dish I took my mum's help but the next time I cook it, I want to experiment with some additions to the recipe.

3. Short Story

'Awakening in a dream'

 

He touched her with tenderness yet with urgency. On that single bed in a small room, their bodies met each other with heightened excitement. In that darkness, they gave into blindness and placed their entire trust in their sense of touch. With one arm on the back of his head and the other arm guiding him, she was holding him like she didn’t want to let go. And he was lost in the moment, with urgency and excitement starting to spiral out of control.

As I awoke from the dream, I realized without any emotion that the girl in bed with my man wasn’t me.

____________

2 days later

Namitha had once told me that distance isn’t about the location; it’s about the heart. For the past couple of days I felt like he’s been pulling away from me. He and I have been fighting for a couple of days now over small, annoying, insignificant things. “Maybe we should break-up”, I said. Without a second thought, he agreed.

5 days later

“I feel we should give it another shot” I said. Relationships do take time and effort after all.

“I’m sorry I can’t”, he replied. And here I thought he would jump at the second chance. What a stupid heart I have.

I asked him “Why?”

After some hesitation he said, “I’m with someone else now.”

“Who?”

“The girl from your dream.”

Sunayana Sen

Week 1 #52weekchallenge

As I mentioned in my previous blog post, I'm taking up a challenge I found on the Internet- 52 weeks of the year. As a part of the challenge, I will be doing three things every week:- a DIY project, cooking/preparing a dish and writing a short story. And in week 1 here's what I accomplished:

1. DIY Project

DIY Pen Stand

2. Cooking Project

Herb Coated Mushrooms with Cheese Sauce

3. Short story - WIP 

Failed on this one this week :(

Sunayana Sen

Har Har Mahadev!

Late last month Amish Tripathi released his last book in the Shiva Trilogy- The Oath of the Vayuputras - and a whole bunch of book lovers in my office went into a frenzy. I didn't quite understand it & quite frankly I was agitated that I didn't know about this famous book when everybody else did! I then looked it up online & decided that I want to read it too. I'm immensely fond of mythology so I took to the book immediately, yet grudgingly so since I knew it was only fiction. But some parts of the book either brought tears to my eyes, or answered an impending question in my head, or left me a tad bit wiser. Sorry Paulo Coelho, your books didn't impact me as much!

Here's an excerpt of the trilogy that I liked most and brought tears to my eyes:

A resounding roar arose from the Suryavanshis. They were led by the Mahadev. The God of Gods. The Chandravanshis did not stand a chance.

"But I am not the only one!" 

 A shocked silence descended on the Surayavanshis. What did the Mahadev mean? He is not the only one? Do the Chandravanshis have a god too?

 "I am not the only one! For I see a hundred thousand Mahadevs in front of me! I see a hundred thousand men willing to battle evil! I see a hundred thousand men capable of destroying evil!"

 The stunned Suryavanshis gaped at their Neelkanth as the import of his words permeated their minds. They dared not ask the question: Are we gods?

   Shiva had the answer: "Har Ek Hai Mahadev!" 

The Meluhans stood astounded. Every single one a Mahadev?  

"Har Har Mahadev?" bellowed Shiva. 

The Meluhans roared. All of us are Mahadevs! 

Pure primal energy coursed through the veins of each Suryanvanshi. They were gods! It didn't matter that the Chndravanshis outnumbered them ten to one. They were gods! Even if the evil Chandravanshis outnumbered them a thousand to one, victory was assured. They were gods! 

"Har Har Mahadev!" cried the Suryavanshi army.

This excerpt had such a profound effect on me and I felt empowered! It was as if I was in that army and I was being spoken to. I still have no idea why this touched me so. Maybe it's a a piece of knowledge that will be used later.

Another beautiful line in The Secret of the Nagas that touched me was:

There is a god in every single one of us. And there is evil in every single one of us. The true battle between good and evil is fought within.

And somewhere later in the book it is said because there's both good an evil in us it takes strength to choose the good. The weak would choose evil. To me this meant that when I have to make a choice, I have to be brutal on my self and choose what's good for most that are involved otherwise I'm weak and that's something I can't live with.

For those who are looking for self-realization and like reading, do read these books. Well written, addictive and helpful. May have the answers to your questions.

Sunayana Sen

Guardian Jewels

Some highly observant people have asked me why I wear my old-fashioned, gold watch all the time. 

It was my Late Didima's (Maternal grandma) watch and she wore it all the time. Boy, did it look great on her! I have other watches too, more 'fashionable' ones but her watch has the timeless uniqueness that none of the prada, gucci, tommy watches can match. Just like my Didima. Most importantly, I wear it because it gives me a sense of comfort that she's always watching over me & I'm not alone.

The necklace is another piece that I inherited from her and I wear it with all my sarees. I never forget to wear it for any family wedding. I wear this necklace because my Didima was a beautiful and fabulous lady and I hope to be a tiny reflection of her some day.

These pieces of jewelry have been through my many ups and downs but have still remained the same timeless beauties, giving me a sense of stability and security just like my Didima did.

Sunayana Sen

"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck" -Dalai Lama

When I was in college studying management, I was predicted to be one of the most successful persons in our batch. I certainly was on the way to becoming it. I participated in organizations and events in and outside college and felt superb about it. One day when I was showing my American friend around the city she asked me if my ambition is to work in one of these corporates and I said, "No, I have bigger ambitions". Then I got a highly coveted job with one of the world's best employers and I started working in one of those buildings. 

Inside Raheja Mindspace, Hitech City, Hyderabad

So let’s go back two years. When my final year began and I was enrolling for placements, I took a systematic path to it. I sat with my uncle who’s a career counselor and drew a timeline. He asked “Where do you see yourself at 30?” and I said, “I’m running my own business.” And then back-tracked from there, put down where I see myself at 27 yrs, at 25 yrs, at 23 yrs, and so forth. I took it a little further and told myself where I saw myself at 50 yrs!

Now a year later I was at my first employer. Since our office culture doesn't take very kindly to formal wear I put all those new, tailor-made formal pants and skirts in the back of my cupboard and brought out all my casuals. The first day I entered office I was ready to take on the world. I was ready to be one of the most successful people of my batch. I knew that I studied in an average college and even though I was one of the best students, I was still an average person. The point is, I was average and I knew it. So I gave myself some time to soak in the changes, understand the mentality and get into that groove. It’s human nature to take some time to adapt. And then I made the biggest mistake.

I told myself that I wasn’t as smart as everybody else.

Trust me when I say that it’s the worst mistake one can ever make. Nobody’s words hit you as hard as your own. So because I wasn’t as smart as others I wouldn’t actively participate in discussions, just be a passive observer. The irony is that one of my top five strengths is ‘Command’. Add my personal problems to this and you get a mess.       

Months went by and in December I was dying. My mind was blank. I couldn’t concentrate on work; I couldn’t understand anything. I was dying to just get away and I decided to go to Singapore. My company was kind enough to give me that time off and Singapore changed it all. After ten days in Singapore I said to myself, “I can’t leave like this. I didn’t work hard in college to leave things mid-way. I will go back and I will give myself six months. I have to go a step further in the next six months.” So I came back and threw myself into work. And the three things I’ve lived by since January are a Constantly ticking internal clock, Gain knowledge and expertise and Do. Everyday I would go work with a sense of urgency telling myself that I don’t have much time left. On my calendars at home and work everyday I strike out the date at the end of the day to reinforce the time limitation. I placed a white board next to me, on outlook started noting down what I do everyday, wrote down important points on post-its and sticking them on my monitor. My work became my competition and my escape so much so that there were times I left office only around midnight to come back at 7 am the next morning. And my favorite part was acquiring new skills. Since I came back, coding and excel have become my pet. Figuring out logic became my drug. Soon you will a Facebook app made by me!

I’ve learnt to make my manager my confidant and it’s worked out pretty well. After three months when I asked her if I’ve moved forward since December, she said I’ve had exponential growth J. I went home and cried that evening! Now I have another three months left and a new problem at hand- I don’t know where I want to go after these three months. Ah well, I’ll deal with it as it comes.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sunayana Sen

Inch-by-Inch

This is one of my favorite speeches EVER! In the most difficult times, this is what I listen too. So far it's this that keeps me going. 

From the movie- 'Any Given Sunday' starring Al Pacino.

I don't know what to say really; three minutes to the biggest battle of our professional lives......all comes down to today.

Either we heal as a team or we're gonna crumble; inch by inch, play by play 'till we're finished.

We're in hell right now gentlemen, believe me. 

And we can stay here and get the shit kicked out of us, or...we can fight our way back, into the light. We can climb out of hell.

One inch at a time.

Now I can't do it for you, i'm too old. I look around, I see these young faces and I think..... I mean I made every wrong choice a middle aged man can make.

I pissed away all my money, believe it or not.

I chased off anyone who's ever loved me.

And lately I can't even stand the face I see in the mirror.

You know....when you get old in life, things get taken from you....that's part of life.

But you only learn that.....when you start losing stuff.

You find out life's a game of inches.

So is football.

Because in either game- life or football- the margin for error is so small...I mean....

One half a step too late or too early and you dont quite make it,

One half second too slow, too fast, you dont quite catch it.

The inches we need are everywhere around us.

They're in every break of the game, every minute, every second.

On this team we fight for that inch.

On this team we tear ourselves and everyone around us to pieces for that inch.

Claw with our fingernails for that inch.

Because we know when we add up all those inches, thats gonna make the f***ing difference between winnin & losing,

between living and dying.

i'll tell you this......

In any fight it's the guy who's willing to die who's gonna win that inch.

And I know that if i'm gonna have any life anymore it's because im still willing to fight & die for that inch.

Because that's what living is. The 6 inches in front of your face.

Now I can't make you do it.

You gotta look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes. Now I think you're gonna see a guy who'll go that inch with you.....

You're gonna see a guy who will sacrifice himself for this team because he knows when it comes to it, you're gonna do the same for him.

That's a team gentlemen.

And either we heal now as a team or we will die as individuals.

That's football guys. That's all it is.

Now.....what are you gonna do?

Sunayana Sen